Back in Black, or New Jersey.

It’s been awhile right? Yes it has. I’ve been busy and completely free for a while now. I finished my Peace Corps service in the midst of parties, tears, and projects nearly not coming to fruition. As I said my last goodbyes I gathered up my final paperwork and retired my official Peace Corps passport. I would no longer be able to exit Costa Rica without paying their fees. Upon my return to the United States, I could feel a change within me that hadn’t been apparent while living in Costa Rica.

While my parents complained about barking dogs and the sidewalks seemed eerily quiet, I enjoyed being in the presence of people. I wanted to say hi to everyone I met walking outside. The barking dogs were slightly endearing. I felt guilt buying shoes, trying to convince myself that my one pair could be dressed up or down, right? I would listen to Minnesota’s only Latino radio station, but still long for merengue, bachata, and cumbia.

My life was made easier by having internet access 24/7 and the ability to call US numbers with my phone. But relocating wasn’t easy either. I missed Costa Rica. I missed the pace. I missed having coffee with neighbors. I missed my family and friends there. I wanted the days I would get trapped inside someone’s house due to the rain having to stay for lunch as well as cafecito. I wanted my free healthcare provided by the best Medical Officers in Peace Corps history. I didn’t want to think about driving a car and having accidents because of bad weather or bad drivers. I didn’t want to think about trying to buy insurance for my car or my health. I still don’t.

I felt distanced from my friends and family. People asked how it was, but how could I explain all the bad times and the good times without be reductive. How could I explain that sometimes I failed miserably at my job, but it always was important and necessary? How could I explain all my successes and make sure they understood how important they were to my community and me? And most importantly, how could I do all this without sounding self-important. After the 10^th time of explaining the same sound bite or detail about my life in Costa Rica, especially to the same person, I got exhausted and sometimes would ask myself if they really cared. But when no one would ask questions or bring up my life for those 2 years I would feel hurt. Like what I did wasn’t important. Like it was something that everyone does, similar to going to school or traveling abroad. I hated to explain the difference between a Peace Corps volunteer and someone who loves world travel. I don’t want to explain that I’m a little jaded right now of volunteer services and organizations, or general do-gooders. And I’m terrified to let people know this.

Fortunately, I was able to go back to Costa Rica and be a part of a community that I missed. But that turned out more different than I had expected as well. I was glad to be back, but I had morphed into a different person within the first month of returning to the States. I had concerns that were based in the US and needed my attention there. The freedom and independence in the US has scared me, but the isolation in the mountain and lack of access felt confining. I had another culture shock moment. I was fairly inconsolable. I didn’t want to let down the people of my town, and felt like I had to visit them, but I also needed time for myself to process everything I was feeling. I hadn’t even started to process my feelings about returning home yet. And there I was, sitting in a house, alone, stressed, worrying about hurting people’s feelings, and wondering why I had done what I did.

I eventually did cut my trip short by 2 weeks, spending only a month there. I did accomplish things there that I wanted to for my two years in the Peace Corps, including riding a horse into the mountains. I was glad I had that time to fully process what I felt and what I did. I still am process it all and trying to sort out who I am now that I’ve been back. Mostly I wanted to get back to the States because it allowed me time to visit the people who I care about there, family and friends included.

I was able to spend a whole week with my uncles, their respective families and my grandmother. I sometimes feel as if I am not able to spend as much time with these people who are so important to me. They are one a connection to my father that I will never be able to having personally anymore, and they have tried to care for me the best they could throughout the years. I am eternally grateful the way they have allowed me to become more than just their niece.

I wish I had more time in Minnesota, but time doesn’t stop here in States like it sometimes seemed to do in Costa Rica. It has its good points, everything is always changing and challenging me in new ways, and its bad points, I can’t have more time to spend with the people and things that I care about. I am now in New Jersey with new concerns, including finding a job and figuring out the bus system. I am prepared and excited to start researching and attending classes. That is probably the least scary aspect of my life. If I could study and write papers without the concerns of transporting myself, money, and work, I would be the happiest girl in the world. I know the easy going nature of Costa Rica, the ability to stop and reflect and take time to think about every single option out there, isn’t going to be available here in New Jersey, but I hope I can teach someone here that it’s still okay to watch the rain instead of bemoaning it.

Also, I will try to continue this blog in regards to my Grad School life. Hopefully, I'll keep it up better than I did in Costa Rica. I guess, Si Dios Quiere, right??

Applying for Grad School:

Edit: I've removed a witty subtitle because someone, somewhere could take offense to it. Lame.

The title of my blog never sounded very Peace Corpsy or Costa Rican. It has none of the Pura Vida’s of my counterparts or the lost in the jungle/saving the world of countless volunteers across the world. The title, itself means a lot more than just my service here in Costa Rica, it is my journey from college student to adult, because I’m sure we can all admit when you’re in college you still aren’t quite an adult yet. Another struggle I want to make clear is the difference that one has when they can peer into a computer and have everything they could possibly want at their fingertips, sometimes even searching for more distractions as the task at hand can be completed within minutes and then forgotten. This is not a luxury I have living in a town with limited cell phone service and even more limited internet access. My internet access comes usually once a week on a particular day if I don’t want to walk 3 km downhill and then returning uphill the same 3 km. On these days I usually spend a minimum of roughly $20 for use of internet, food, and transportation, these costs rise if I have to buy food that can’t be found in the small local pulperia (a small store that provides basic food and snacks along with other household goods: light bulbs, cleaning supplies, some office supplies), make copies, send faxes, and get other supplies that again can’t be found in my town either. Now, I’ll admit my life is a lot easier than many Peace Corps volunteers. I have no boats to ride, no long walks in the sun (most of my way is shaded by trees), and most of the dogs I pass are friendly or at least lazy. But having internet for a limited amount of time makes you go crazy.

The past five months, maybe six, I have been applying to graduate school. This has meant signing up for, studying, and taking the GRE, finding out information about the schools I want to attend (and whether they have scholarships and fellowships for Peace Corps volunteers), getting deadlines correct, making sure I have everything they specifically want, sending in information or requesting that outside sources send in this information, contacting old professors for recommendations, and trying to think about why I would be the perfect candidate for their program all the while trying to move along projects here in Costa Rica.

A little metaphor for my brain every Friday I come into work on this would be a 1,000 piece puzzle that you dump out on the table. When you first look at it, it’s just a mess of some colored pieces and some brown pieces. Here and there you may recognize a feature on the box, but most of it is just a mess of blues, greens, and browns. You must sit down and flip over all the pieces, or you may first (as I always do) separate the outside pieces from the middle, chucking all the middle pieces back into the box to be looked at later. Arranging the outside is like getting all the facts together for applying to grad school. When to apply, what documents you need, who you need to contact, what exactly are you applying for. You slowly put together the puzzle, but oh dear what do we have here, some missing pieces. Are they on the floor? Did they get lost with the middle pieces? You search the floor; you dump out the box again and slowly go through each piece checking for that straight edge. Of course, I usually don’t notice the missing piece until I get back home and cannot do anything about it for another week. So I will make a little note in some notebook that is filled with other little notes that will probably get lost amid that confusion or left at home when I go to the bus stop. Also, since I have other things going on in my life, work and distractions to keep myself from going crazy such as news and music, it’s like having multiple puzzles going on at one time. I’m going back and forth between gathering information for an English class, pulling together different aspects of a grant, and trying to find out whose being elected where and why it matters. My brain is a Jackson Pollock painting, but there is no organic chaos happening; It is just chaos.

When I have the entire outside complete and ready or at least have given up trying to find the missing pieces, they’ll show up eventually or I can’t waste my time anymore searching for them, I set off to do the bulk of the work. Slowly, I find the same colors and start putting them together. I start gathering up all my transcripts and resumes, my scores and grades and I send them in. I contact my recommenders and get a different username and password for each application which can only be completed online. The one thing I can do offline is write the Personal and Aspirational Statements, but these are not without catches. Each ask a different thing from the prospective student, whether it is to focus on your past or your future or the amount of words you can use. Some ask for the miniscule 250 words only (I don’t remember the last time I wrote so little), or give you the generous 1,000 words to sum up your entire life: past, present, and future (not to mention why their school is superior to all others, even though you have 4 or 5 other schools that would do just as well).

Amid all this chaos, you’ve realized you’ve sent your GRE scores to the wrong school, used the wrong deadline for your recommenders, you forgot, or they never told you, that to get the application fee waiver, you needed to send in a special letter signed by the Peace Corps director stated that yes you are a Peace Corps volunteer a month before started your application, the universities still haven’t received your transcripts you asked to have sent two months ago (it didn’t say you had to pay, but knowing the system you probably have to go back to your alma matar sign five different forms, promise your first born, and go back the next week asking to talk to the Wizard of Oz, who turns out to be a computer that just asks you to push a little button with “Send” written neatly in white Arial Black font. “It’s really not that complicated” the lady behind the glass, bulletproof wall tells you), and you remember that personal statement you wrote last week, well now you’re having doubts about it being your best work, the thing that will really make you stand out, make it impossible for them to say no. Now you think “Shit, a five year old could have written this”. Important emails requesting information you should have had two weeks ago will not be answered until 3 p.m. when you have already boarded your bus and won’t have a chance to find until next week, in which you’ll have to send another clarifying email, or make a phone call on Skype that may or may not work because your microphone is picking up too much background noise, or somehow doesn’t work when making an outside call to an actual phone.

The conversation will be mostly like this: “Hello.” “Hello?” “Hello?” “Hello, can you hear me?” “Hello?” Click. Then, you will write an email explaining you are a Peace Corps volunteer and phone calls to the States are practically impossible, so anyway you can do this through email would be terrific, thanks for being so kind and understanding to someone serving the country, blah blah blah. Don’t worry all that grandiose self-pity wears on my nerves too (oh wait, this whole blog entry is a grandiose self-pity fest, ok I give up, feed my ego and pat my head saying how much you admire me, thanks.)

Anyways, long story short, just applying for grad school has been difficult. I still worry about whether or not I’ll make the January 15^th deadline for those looking for scholarships and fellowship, and sometimes I want to write a letter to the board of admissions, maybe attaching this very blog entry to it, explaining that I must really want to go to their school after putting all this effort into applying to their school which may or may not even get me my dream job after all is said and done. And maybe that third year serving your country won’t be so bad. I mean, after this a room full of out of control children that smell your lack of classroom management skills and trying to sound like a nine year old instead of a two year old to a group of 40-50 years olds who in reality have a lot more experience then you do is a piece of cake.

Hobbies

Here in the Peace Corps I have realized I have an immense passion for 4 things. Well, realized is probably the wrong word since I’ve always enjoyed them, but now I’ve explored them on different levels. Anyways, I have digressed. Those 4 things are cooking, reading, writing, and painting. You could also include watching movies and listening to music, but I’m pretty sure everyone enjoys both of those things to some extent. Except my brother, who I remember him saying he can’t watch the last parts of movies cause he gets so bored and agitated and has to do something else. He says he always has to be doing something, although I’m sure I’ve caught him doing nothing for periods of time while I’ve been doing nothing except, apparently, not minding my own business. Again, I digress (apparently getting distracted runs in the family). So movies and music are out because they are tired cliques that don’t mean much anyways, not that the other 4 mean much either, but it’s hard to take up cave exploration or space discovery here in the campo.

As far as cooking goes, I could see myself being a housewife if only to cook all day making elaborate meals. And I do do that here in Costa Rica, when I have more than 10,000 colones to support myself for the month, for those months I have to be satisfied with making elaborate rice sculptures (note to Sam and Kristi: if you were thinking ice sculpture for your wedding I hear rice is more en vogue). I love having a finished product, which if you knew my writing or art you’d know that that rarely happens. But maybe the best part of cooking is the process. There’s a sort of love that must go into every dish before it can taste good, although I’m sure plenty of tasty things have come from salty people. Even cutting onions has become pleasurable if only to have a good cry, especially if The Notebook or Atonement are playing on my computer simultaneously. Most of the time I’ve been tasting the dish so much that by the time dinner is ready, I’m full. Those are the times I wish I had someone to share it with. Of course, like my art and writing, I’m shy about the things I’ve put my heart into, and would hate to get my feelings hurt if it really did, well, suck.

Reading is the next pleasure that comes to mind, especially on the rainy days that we’ve been having lately. I’ve read more books than I think I ever had, especially if you never counted those Babysitter Club books or the Boxcar Kids. The thing is I love reading. And this is going to be really corny and/or cheesy (I know there’s a difference between the two, but can’t quite put my finger on it), but when I read I get to be a different person, live in a different world, have a different life. Reading is an escape, plus it helps me learn new words for the GRE and keep my English from completely abandoning me. If I’m feeling lonely or unloved I pick up a good romance, adventure, well just read a little Hemmingway, or if I think the world just sucks, Russian lit is the way to go. If I really try, and sometimes it’s not as hard as it may seem, I can read a whole book (500 pages plus) in one sitting. I even prefer it to movies. For one, I don’t have Kiera Knightly telling me what a British, upper class, period woman is like. Reading, like for most volunteers, has become a part of my life. It is no longer just a hobby, but part of the lifestyle, just like drinking champagne on a yacht off Martha’s Vineyard is for the Kennedys.

So what do I do when I’m not reading or cooking (I guess you can throw in working as well, but working and Peace Corps is about as vague as the day you were conceived, you know it happened you just don’t know how or in what context and prefer not to know for that matter)? I am either writing the next great novel or becoming Georgia O’Keefe. Ok, so that will never happen, but why have a blog and not think of yourself in some sort of grandeur. So I paint, with watercolors if you were curious, and I write, mostly really short (painfully short sometimes) stories and poetry. None of this will any of you see or read probably, unless I die and you have an exhibition of it all and embarrass me post mortem. I write and paint various things; whatever seems to catch my fancy, blogging seems to not catch my fancy at all, luckily or unluckily for you all. There’s really not much to say about it, only that it helps me get rid of all my excess thoughts, reorganize my brain, and focus myself on something (again with the family trait of a short attention span).

So, these are the things that I do when I’m not working, maybe soon I’ll have another blog entry with an update on my actual work although it’s mostly the same: water project, English for adults and kids, and a few surprises here and there that I won’t reveal because I don’t want to jinx them. I did move into a new house and below are some pictures of the place. Enjoy.

Finally an Update

What better time to write a blog when you are sitting in a hotel room thinking about what to do next. That's right, I'm in a hotel room. Why so posh? you might ask. Well, it because this week is All Volunteer Conference, which is a 3 day get together with all the other volunteers to get together, have a bit of fun, and also do some project updates/information sessions. It also means that volunteers come a little before and after to hang out and enjoy each other's company.

So what else have I been doing besides enjoying the capital. Well, I am still teaching English to adults and kids. My adult class has dwindled down to 4 students, which has its ups and downs. Most of my former students have left for bigger (or at least for different things) such as employment opportunities or college. And while its sad to see them go, I am really glad that they are finding bigger and better things for themselves. The students I do have are great. We have a lot of fun and its nice being able to basically be a private tutor. I think they get more out of the class and its more intimate. Although, I should be requiring more English only, but I'm a pushover sometimes.

My little kids are also going well. Every day with them is a challenge, because again I'm a giant pushover so have little classroom management skills. But they are fun and I can tell that at least most of them at least enjoy seeing my face, whether or not they enjoy learning. And some of them are just so darn cute, its hard to not love them to pieces. Right now we are learning about family, and going on to clothing. I've really started to incorporate art into ever lesson, or every "unit". I think this is incredibly important since they don't have a "art" class. I know that art was one of my favorite things to do, and I can see that art or even having to think creatively and/or uniquely is something that kids here don't do because of the lack of resources (teachers, materials, time to name a few).

My big projects (or project) is getting the aqueduct system put in. We just had a man from AyA (the water company) come in to check the natural springs that would feed our aqueducts. He was really positive about putting them in and we are moving on that side of the table. Now we just have to come up with a solution for managing all this. Which means we need to somehow create an ASADA. Now that wouldn't be challenging, but AyA wants us to work with other communities, but my town wants to have full control of their water (understandable, I think). Compromise is going to have to come, and maybe I'll have to start using my negotiation skills.

Some smaller things that are going on are that we are starting to plan for the town fiestas. They should be great this year, with a mountain bike race, a cabalgata, and of course dancing and eating. I'm going to be helping out a lot, asking for donations, cooking, and general set-up/take-down. But it should be fun and I want to make the most of it since it will be my last one.

Also, we just had a Grandparents' Day party. It turned out great, most of the older people came and we even had Channel 13 there filming the whole thing. And we're looking to get bigger. Next year, we want to take all 30 of them (about) to the Nicoya Peninsula. Most haven't left Herradura, or least not the Perez Zeledon region. This would be a great chance for them to see the country and get out of their homes for a while. A lot of planning and fundraising is going to have to happen to accomplish this, but I have hope. I may even write to Oprah, no I will write to Oprah (can't hurt).

On a more personal note, I am applying to graduate school. I am really excited but also absolutely terrified. I have to take the GREs, ask for recommendations, and fill out really tedious applications. But, hopefully in a year, it will be all worth it when I am attending one of the schools I am applying for. So wish me luck and any advice would be a godsend.

Take care wherever you might be. Ciao for now.

I Fail

So, I apparently can't keep up with blogging, no matter what tricks I use. I'm sorry, but I promise (cross my heart) to update my blog sometime this week since I'll have internet all week. Its All Volunteer Conference time so hopefully (no definitely) I will fill you in on all my going-ons.

Final Jeopardy

I finally got the Final Jeopardy right! Well, to be fair it was Teen Jeopardy, but still one step at a time right? The question was basically which Bible character refused the King of Israel's sword and stuff in a battle. It was David. Thank you Sunday School.

Happy Thoughts

As you all probably know, I’m pretty bad at keeping up a blog. Which means my dreams of making millions off a blog featuring crazy cat photos with equally crazy captions is out the window. Anyways, I need inspiration to write, or at least to write about things I don’t mind you and the general public reading. The Peace Corps office has a resource lounge, where you can usually find at least one volunteer wasting time and sitting around (but not talking about whether or not it’s going to rain or how hot it is, because that’s what we do in our sites). Also there are shelves of books for us to borrow and hopefully not getting them stolen on the bus (don’t worry we all make fun of the thief later because really no one but us wants a badly used copy of “War and Peace”). Part of our wasting time also consists of perusing this wide selection of books. I’ve gone through most of them, or at least the ones I’ve really been dying to read, so the self-help section was my last frontier. Here, I found a little book, “Happy Thoughts”. This book gives you 333 different scenarios that will make your day a little brighter. They range from everyday (iced tea on a hot day) to more extraordinary (winning 2 million in the state lottery). Not only does this provide me with great material for my blog (I mean, do you really want to hear how the kids in my classes hassled me until I let them play soccer again, or how I walked home in the rain again without an umbrella), it also gives me something do keep my spirits up because as much fun as the Peace Corps has been and continues to be, it still can be lonely and disappointing at times.

So here you go, the things that made me smile this week:

1. Catching a train just as it’s about to pull out: Well it was a bus. The bus from my town gets into the bigger town (San Isidro) around 8:20-30 a.m. If I want to go to San Jose, usually I can only make the 9:30 bus. Waiting around is fine, but it usually means you have to go to a restaurant and pay for a cup of coffee and pray their wireless is working, or walk around aimlessly trying not to get too sweaty. But this day was different. The bus pulled into the station at 8:15, I knew if I ran (well, run is an exaggeration, walk quickly with style is more accurate) I’d make it there at least by 8:23ish. Although, that wouldn’t guarantee there would be tickets left either. I just had to pray that I could make the 8:30 bus and that there would be a seat available for me. And as you can guess, I was in luck. Not only in luck for making the 8:30 bus, but in luck because I got a seat all to myself, something that wouldn’t have happened if I had bought a ticket ahead of time. I made it to San Jose before noon and actually had time to get to my hotel before running my errands which is pretty much unheard of any other time.

2. A hug when you really need one- So, I didn’t really need a hug, but it was still really sweet. I was playing an “English” game with my little kids. Basically, they are on teams, one team starts with the ball and has to try to make a goal, while the other team defends the goal. Each kid goes one at a time and if they make the goal the “goalie” has to say a vocabulary word (this week parts of the body), and if they don’t make a goal the “kicker” has to say a vocabulary word. We were playing and all of a sudden one of my newest students comes up to me, looks up and gives me a big hug. Something unexpected like that is really wonderful. What’s especially great is that you’ve already made a connection with a kid and hopefully you being there makes them feel just as great.

3. Playing with puppies- One of my neighbors and a lady that I’m close with, just got a new puppy. We were waiting for a meeting to start and she had said puppy with her. The dog was just so cute it’s hard not to smile. Deep inside I wanted a puppy too, because really it would be a great motivator to go out walking every day, and a way to put a smile on my face whenever I’m having a bad day. But then I thought of one word and decided the neighbors can have their dogs, I’ll just play with them: Fleas.

My favorite is getting the final Jeopardy question right, I'm still waiting.

I've been cooking!

So, now that I'm in a place all by myself, I've been doing some cooking. So here's a list of things I've made... because I know you're all curious.

banana bread

poached eggs

lasagna

oatmeal banana pancakes (because people love to give m their bananas)

a banana cream tart/pie/crisp

orange chicken

bbq sauce

garlic mashed potatoes

funfetti cake

french bread (which turned out like poo, but I still made it)

other things that aren't that interesting

ok thats all for now....

Pictures for Bulletpoints

This is a picture of the rock statue things to help guide your way to Chirripo. Well little did they know that even though I was in Girl Scouts for 6 monthes and could only sell 5 boxes of cookies (to my parents and my grandmother), these only helped a little bit and really I just got lucky.
Self-explanatory.
Here I am at the top.
I got lost (of course I did) and ended up at a mountain peak called Ventisquaros. It had a pretty awesome view and apparently you can see my town. Apparently.
Los Crestones, I didn't make it there because I had walked enough that day.

I'll just go ahead and bulletpoint this for you

Ok... so you'd think I'd have time to write a real blog post every once in while, and I probably do, but I guess I'll never be a blogger and make millions. Anyways, I'm going to sum up my life in bulletpoints, because they're easy and a lot more reader friendly.

-Due to having an extremely small school we lost a teacher, which means that there was no more time for my English Classes or my Chicas Poderosas group, but just this past week I found out that the teacher was able to come back, so hopefully I'll get that all worked out

-I'm now taking care of a gringo's house at the outer edges of town. This means privacy and more independence. Its already great. Too bad its just til Sept.

-I climbed up to the top of Chirripo, which is the highest mountain in Costa Rica. It took me 6 hours to get the base camp and getting lost and going to a different mountain peak before I reach the very tippy top of Chirripo. It was a lot of fun and I'm glad I did it, my feet on the other hand, hate me.

-At my new house, there is a "stray" kitten. It hangs out and meows about, only to run away when I get close. I've named it Spooky, we'll see if it decides to call me mommy or decides life in the wild is preferrable to a non-cat lover.

Thats all I can remember for now. I'll keep trying hard to keep the updates, well you know, updated.

Picture Post....

So here are a few pictures because I'm too lazy to write anything else. And I haven't gotten to the internet in about 2 weeks so I'm super busy downloading music and you know getting stuff for work. Oh yeah, and I have an impossible amount of errands to run before I leave town. So, a few updates. My parents came and visited me for a week. The last three pictures are of them. My town had a tourno, or a party, and I served fried chicken all day. And I went to an outdoor concert that a friend of mine had, not in my town. Maybe I'll write more later, or you'll have to wait until I come home, cause at this rate, I suck at keeping up a blog.

Still Pretty Hard to Find

Just wanted to inform you all that I got a new cell phone. This means when I come down from my site and stay within an area that has a signal, you can find me or at least get a hold of me. This also means if I get lost I don't have to go on a pay phone scavenger hunt. Overall, it was a good decision, I hope at least after I work out all the bugs...

A little sentimental

The last post was a little sentimental for my personal taste. I guess we can crack it up to me not having seen my closest friends and family for the past 10 months or so. Anyways, I did mean it all, but it probably won't happen again for another 10 months. But like my mom said, sometimes you should get a little sentimental, maybe she's right.

Holidaytime

The holidays are for families. They are days when you get together with all the people you can and share stories, food, and gifts. Along with the cheer and joy, there is stress and tension. But always there is family. About 8 years ago, I lost one of the most important people in my life, my dad. His death left a huge gap in my life, and my holidays. No longer would he plop our traditional lobsters in the pot of boiling water, no longer would I wake up at 4 in the morning to try, unsuccessfully, to wake up both my parents 2 hours earlier then they would like, and no longer would I be able to share my holiday cheer and hope with him. 8 years ago I would never believe that I would slowly fill up that hole left by him with more people to love and love me.

Over the years, I have come across more people who have added themselves to my family. My high school girlfriends, who no matter the distance or time between us, can pick up where we left, gather missing stories up over dinner, and laugh at ourselves, each other, and well the unfortunate (or perhaps fortunate) souls that we have had the pleasure of spending time with. They have been a support that I can’t imagine not being in my life, no matter what happens. They keep me sane, silly, grounded, and dreaming. Liz, Leila, Evelyn, and Calli are what people hope to find in a lifetime, and perhaps what makes us so amazing is our differences. From pop culture obsessed, country music dancing, and hipster mocking lovers we make sure to let everyone know they aren’t free from being ridiculous in their passions, and not immune from loving ridicule.

College brought along 2 other women into my life. Kate and Laura are two people who brought out new things about me and through boyfriends and long nights we still know how to have a good time and the meaning of good friends. College is one of the first times in most people’s lives that takes them away from their families, forcing them to create a new one with friends who don’t share giant noses, unmanageable hair, distinct accents, or strange last names. These two women came from close to home and across the ocean. Never would I have guessed that our first meeting, where first impressions were wrong, that they would be people I would never not want to meet. Along with Kate and Laura, I also have a whole host of friends that came into my life, some have gone onto bigger, better things, some have stayed in contact, and some fade in and out in my life. All have made impacts on me in their own ways and I can never forget.

A year ago I wasn’t even thinking about the people I would now include within my ever growing family. Danielle, Leslie, Kathryn, and all the RCD 19ers that I shared 3 months with and now every so often a weekend or whole week, remembering long nights, long days, and successes and challenges (both in our sites and our lives). They have become my support, some of the only people that understand what I am experiencing and for months the people who give me a dose of home. I also can’t forget about the people that have added themselves to my life from the other projects, namely Adrienne and Nicole. Adrienne happened to end up, lucky or unlucky for her, next to me. She is definitely one of the people I don’t mind walking back up my hill to go see. Nicole has been one of the people that has added joy and excitement to my life. I know I can rely on her to always be there, just like she can rely on me.
Moreover, I have had a huge add-on of family members, I now I have 2 more fathers, Rodrigo and Sigifredo, 2 new mothers, Emilce and Lisbeth, 3 more brothers Mauricio, Fabian, and Felipe, 3 more sisters Cynthia, Catalina, and Paulina, and now a new sister-in-law Josline. These people have feed me, cleaned my clothes, entertained me, taken me out, taught me, put up with my sometimes atrocious Spanish, and most importantly loved me and listened to me. They have understood when I was lonely or missing home, they have understood when I needed my privacy or control over my meals, they have understood that I come from a different culture and a different world, but opened themselves and their lives up to a new daughter, sister, and friend. I also can’t forget all the aunts, uncles, cousins, grandmothers, and all the other people in my community that have opened their homes, their cupboards, and their hearts to me and my mission to save the world. We have laughed, shared stories and fears, and taught each other invaluable lessons on life and love. I owe so much to you all, and I have so much more to share with you and learn from you.

Most importantly, perhaps, my mom after losing my father decided to love someone else. This brought more members into my family. I have a step-dad now, Bill. He has brought joy into my mom’s life, which is the best gift you could have given me. I have 2 new step-sisters, and even though I don’t skype them as much as my host mom would like me to, they are apart of my family and I do love them as I love members of my family. I also have a sabrina and a step(?)-brother-in-law and a wonderful new aunt. All these people have added new dimensions to my life and I wouldn’t change a thing that would make them not be apart of my life.

Happy Holidays all, whether it is Christmas, Hanukah, just the News Years, and of course all the December birthdays (including mine) that probably got passed over in the past. I love each and every one of you. Be safe, have fun, and a remember to love everyone you meet.

Minnesota vs. Costa Rica

Riding down the Interamerica after a long weekend in San Jose always feels so good. Maybe it’s the plush seating in the Musoc buses or perhaps the cool, foggy road that curves just enough to rock you to sleep, but I know that it’s because that bus ride means I’m going home. But Costa Rica and Minnesota are worlds away, you might say. And what about the fact that no one understands that Christmas is not Christmas unless it looks like a Thomas Kinkade painting (especially if it’s the puzzle your grandma has mounted on her wall), or that while Costa Rica is beautiful nothing can compare to the North Woods on an early summer morning. Loons and roosters definitely don’t compare when it comes to which you want to wake you up. Minnesota and Costa Rica do seem like polar opposites, but you dig down deeper and they are eerily similar.
In Minnesota, there are snow days. Every winter morning after a storm, the first thing you do is turn the T.V. on just to see if school is closed or at least 2 hours delayed. Here in Costa Rica they have “meeting” days, where the teacher has a meeting somewhere about something to go to, meaning no classes. In my small town, most of the men are farmers and own plots of land up and down the mountains. I see similar issues surrounding the lack of jobs and money in the family farm as you see in rural Minnesota. Kids grow up and want bigger things; they attend college to get jobs in the city. What will happen to these farms as the generations change is all too familiar to the changing social landscape of Middle-of-Nowhere, Minnesota.
Home is also where you feel comfortable being yourself. I remember Dahlia’s sessions on indirect cultural. When they say yes they mean no. I get this, when I say I’ll think about it, it probably means I think it’s a lame idea and I just don’t want to tell you so. Ahorita is probably my favorite word; since you could often hear me say “In a little bit” or “after awhile” back home in Minnesota. Costa Ricans and Minnesotans have an undeniable connection when it comes to trying to beat around the bush. I still question whether people actually want me to come to their house or are just saying it to be nice, because an invitation is just polite in Minnesota and telling them you’d love to but you are busy is the appropriate response.
In Minnesota, saying hello is obligatory, even to complete strangers. This is practically parallel to Costa Rica. The only difference is how to say hello. O f course there is hola vs. hello or hi, but out in the campo (Costa Rica or Minnesota) you’ve got to shorten that up. Here in Costa Rica it’s typically the grunt, I believe contrived from people’s parece over saying adios. Head nods or finger waves are typical in rural Minnesota; this I believe is due to people’s laziness of not wanting to wave their whole hand. The kid racing down the hill on his bike in rural Costa Rica and the passing truck on a lonely Minnesota county road will all feel obligated to acknowledge you even if as soon as you respond they are too far away to hear. Saying hi, in both Costa Rica and Minnesota, might mean you have to stop by and start up some small talk, usually about the weather, never about politics or religion. You might get offered something refreshing to drink and there’s a difference between outside shoes and inside shoes.
Potlucks and turnos are basically the same thing. They are an excuse to get out of the house and eat. Although turnos usually have the food made on site, whereas the potluck everyone brings their crockpot with some sort of cassorole(who know that anyone could love a crockpot more than a Minnesotan). Minnesotans love Spam and Costa Ricans love Mortadala, but in the end it’s all hoofs and ears anyways. Replace rice for potatoes, both plates are at least half of either. We both love boiled vegetables, with lots of salt, and tal vez some crazy sauce on it (cheese sauce for my broccoli or salsa de tomatios, it’s a tough decision at this point).
No matter how much I miss Minnesota, there is so much here that makes me feel as if I’d never left. In fact, I’m surprised I haven’t found people with plastic covered furniture here. The weather is reminiscent of spring time in Minnesota, with sunsets casting soft pinks, purples, and yellows across the green fields. You can breathe the air and walk alone at night. People watch out for you, and yes they even know all your business. Everyone has a nephew, grandson, or friend you just have to meet, and most importantly hugs are always appropriate hellos and goodbyes.

Picking Coffee

So I will never complain about an expensive cup of coffee again, nor should you. This last Wednesday I went out with my father and sister to pick coffee. I fell into some holes, hit myself with numerous branches, and ended up with an ankle full of gnat bites. All for a total of 250 colones (about 50 cents) worth of coffee. This was about 7lbs of raw coffee. I was out there for only an hour and a half, but I think as a regular coffee drinker and as someone who has worked in various coffee shops its important to know what exactly goes into that delicious latte or mocha that you are drinking or serving. Coffee season goes from late October until December. I'm not sure if I'll be going back out into the field, but I'll sure apperciate my cafecitos in the tarde a whole lot more.

In other news, I'm on the HIV/AIDS safer sex practices committee (we're shortening it to the safe sex committee). December 1st is World AIDS day, and I am going to be making 500ish red ribbons for the volunteers to wear and hand out in their communities. I'm also going to be working on more talleres for the PCVs at AVC (All Volunteer Conference) and for school presentations. Wish me suerte!

Vacation Time

So, some of you might have noticed that I've been on the internet at strange times and well a lot more this week. Thats because I'm vacationing down in Uvita. Uvita is beautiful. It is small and quiet, but has an amazing beach. I know, I know, you're all thinking wait Costa Rica isn't vacation enough?! Well my life here has been pretty amazing, its true, but every job has it stressful moments and slowly but surely my life is getting filled to the brim with stuff to do. 2 different English classes, Monday-Thursday, my Association meetings and the upcoming general assembly (which we still haven't planned for, but I mean plans never actually work down here anyways), I just got news that I'm on the HIV/AIDS safe sex committee which means more meetings and a chance to get out to new communities and show off all my Spanish skills, and of course there's coffee season. Coffee season means, that after my fingers heal from shelling corn all day, I'll be going out into the field (with my machete for the snakes, of course), and helping my father or one of my other family members pick coffee. I can't wait... it will also make going home for Christmas all the sweeter.

A Little Update

Just a little update on my life here in Costa Rica. I've officially started my Adult English classes, which means I'm teaching English 4 days a week now. The class has about 19 students in it, from intermediate speakers to people who have never really been exposed to English at all. This poses challenges such as how to keep one group engaged while not going too fast for the others, and trying to give each student the necessary one on one time that they all deserve. I know all this will come with time as I get more accustom to my students and to the lessons.

I've also gone on a few adventures. I had my first Tico camping experience here. S'mores made with Chiky's (my favorite chocolate on the bottom cookie, kinda like the Kebler cookie with the hole in the middle) were delicious and the pollo asado, grilled chicken, that we made.

There will be more on this when I get a chance to come back to the internet, but for now I wish you all the best, and can't wait to see you Christmas (did I mention that you can see my pretty face during Navidad?) Well Pura Vida!

Starry Skies

Last night I looked up at the sky and literally saw thousands of stars. It was the most beautiful thing in the world. I really do live in a paradise where every night I get put to sleep by the river thats in my backyard, wake up to sunshine, and nap during the afternoon showers.

Of Moths and Mold

There are two things in Costa Rica that will sneak up on you when you least expect them: moths and mold. Moths I've known for quite some time now. Every night they find the nearest light and flutter around in a mad craze. These moths come in all different sizes, shapes, and colors. I've seen one as big as a bat (I know you'd love that one mom), and ones as small as my thumbnail. Either way they are very pesky when you are trying to work on your computer late at night (around 9 pm these days). I've also noticed they have a habit of eating clothes. We were all told throughout training that our mother's vigorous washing of our clothes would ruin them, but for me that couldn't be farther from the truth. Already I have small holes in 2 shirts, I'm just waiting for more.

All my friends have been talking about the mold that seems get on everything they own. I hadn't seen any of it, and thought my place high in the mountains prevent that kind of stuff from appearing on me. No such luck. After I had gotten back from a long meeting in San Jose, I was getting ready for the day. I looked around my "closet" only to see my belts (which I rarely if ever wear) with a thick coat of mold growing on them. I took them to my mom and she just shook her head and plopped them in some soapy water. Hopefully they will be the first and last things to mold.

Of course there are always the ants, who also eat everything, including the moths that eventually die (I'm guessing from overeating). They have eaten my watercolors, gotten into my body wash bottle, and I've also found them swarming my dirty laundry bag (no it hadn't been sitting out for weeks). They have formed a nice little procession across a ledge in my bedroom. Day and night, they truly are the hardest working animals on this planet.